Nature Red In Tooth And Claw

Tennyson's pre-Darwin observation on the struggle for survival is on target today. We have moved into the new home and we love it here, but there are still so many things to do. Everyone's overwhelmed and struggling hard to keep going and in the midst of this the children are forced to deal with their mother's battle to survive.

In the past few days she has been in and out of surgery several times with no surgery actually performed. As far as I can tell the problem is at once simple to state and very difficult to resolve. It seems that the situation entirely a matter of playing the odds. 

The MERSA in her leg is continuing to spread and cause more and more damage.  The terrible choice is to remove the leg or let the MERSA eventually kill her. However, her heart is in such bad condition that the anesthesiologist does not want to put her under for fear that she will die as a result.

So what is worse? What is the best bet for her to survive? It really isn't all that clear.  The kids are very upset with the hospital, understandably so. But I think the doctors are truly doing their best. The surgeon wants that leg removed so that he can control the infection. But when they bring her into the operating room the anesthesiologist sees that she is not in condition to survive being rendered unconscious. As horrible as it is for everyone, I hardly think the doctors are being callous about this. Instead, I expect they are agonizing over this terrible decision.

We have just heard that she is going into surgery once again. Whether the surgery will actually be performed and whether she will survive it are open questions.

To get back to Tennyson, when we look at the world we see its beauty. That beauty is real. But we usually neglect to see the ugliness that lies underneath it. We struggle and we do our best we try to find what joy and happiness we can. We are not wrong to do so. But the brutality of the battle to survive is always ready to make itself known.