Sunday, July 21, 2013

Whiny Guy, Superhero!

A view into Facebook.

This is part of an exchange with an old friend of mine. I had mentioned that my house was tilting the right no matter which direction in which I looked.  She asked me to explain.  So I did.

Nothing to worry about, Joyce. Just my body being itself again. Every now and then, my brain insists that the world has been tilted. The most common effect is tilling to the left or to the right. Every sense of my body says that the world is in fact tilted, so much so that it is difficult not to grab hold of the bed, couch, or chair upon which I'm sitting to avoid falling off and smacking against the opposite wall, which is now down so low that gravity should be pulling me there. Of course, I'm not going to fall and gravity has not altered, but my senses insist that it has. They very convincingly insist that it has.  Only the fact that I do not actually fall proves that my senses are wrong.

This one actually isn't too bad. At its very worst I literally cannot walk unless I watch my feet. If I take my eyes off them I am so unaware of up versus down that I simply fall over. That, thankfully, is very rare. It's usually much less extreme.  Sorry I worried you! I just thought everybody knew about my...peculiarity.

P. S.

Actually, when it's at its worst I don't have to watch my feet; I have to watch my hands, because then I have to crawl, standing up isn't possible. But again, that's very rare occurrence and hasn't happened in a number of years, though once it was rather common. Let's hope it never happens again!  At times like this, I'm fond of declaring to anyone in the vicinity that they must be human flies since they don't notice the tilt and show no fear of falling.

Life is strange, indeed!  I try to keep smiling and laugh at myself.  It really helps to do so.

Having made this post and thought about it, it occurs to me that I have been underestimating myself

I don't need to be the wannabe, almost, but somehow failing to quite make it, superhero,  "Couch Potato Man" -- lying  around dreaming and hoping for the day when I can find a willing sidekick to be Wifey. I already am a superhero. I am Whiny Guy and I don't need no stinking sidekick! I'm  a real good whiner all by myself. 

Watch out world!  Here I don't come to save the day!


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