I am having a bad night. I've fallen a few times, once actually ending up in the closet as the floor suddenly tilted and dumped me against the door, which popped open. I am in and out of awareness, sometimes asleep and then in whatever state entraps me whenever I am so disoriented. I hope I can get back to actual sleep. I was even having pleasant dreams. In any case, here is a post from the holidays:
It's a beautiful day today. A Symphony in Gray. With luck, it'll rain or maybe even snow . This is good because right now I'm not feeling so great. I was feeling really fine yesterday, catching up on Big Bang Theory and thoroughly enjoying the evening. Then I got up and found myself against the wall, which, for some odd reason, had become the floor.
I had a very bad night. And I'm not doing so well today, as everything seems to be tilted. You know, like being in one of those fun houses at a tourist attraction. I know the house isn't actually tilted because I'm the only one who's trying to keep his balance as he walks across the floor. Logic forces me to conclude that either I am extremely disoriented or my family is following the lead of Jeff Goldblum and have all somehow added fly DNA to their genome and are now capable of walking up walls without even blinking. Note: for the age limited, look up the movie The Fly to understand the previous reference.
This, of course, is just an aspect of my life as it is been for the past 15 years or so. What really troubles me, is that this is my favorite time of year. The holiday season begins with Halloween and ends with New Year's. Of course, I will have the great joy of all of my family with whom I have contact. But I cannot help but be wounded and sad as my prodigal daughter still has not contacted me and so I still have little hope of seeing my lost lambs who she is withholding for me because of resentment over step family issues.
And now let's end with one of my favorite songs, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8i94JqPKmgc.
Of course, I prefer the original lyrics:
I am a really whiny guy.
All I do is whine and cry.